Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
