I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
