We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
birth control should be required to get into college
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
