Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
