haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
