I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize