last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I need water and some morals
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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