She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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