So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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