Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
