Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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