i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
