dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
