this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
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