I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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