Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
