Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
