She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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