I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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