note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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