Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize