Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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