Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
