Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
