Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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