me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
We were destined to go to rehab together
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
