we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize