I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize