Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
