i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I'm like, not good at living.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
