Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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