I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize