is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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