I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
cat food counts as protein by the way
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize