in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
