I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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