i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
