it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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