return my video game
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
