In the future we'll all be gay
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
