I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
