you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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