You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
