Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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