I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
