if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
