He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
