Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
