'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
