I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
