What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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